"Five Facet Review."

One interesting thing about the "field" of parenting is that there really are no experts. There are psychiatrists and psychologists and others who had studied child development, but each child is an individual, different from any other, and the only person with much chance of becoming an expert on that child is that child's parent.

Often we know more about our own children than we realize. It takes some focused thought and analysis to make ourselves aware and use the things we already "know." The five-facet review is a method for drawing out and focusing on your child.

Once each month go out to dinner with your spouse (or with someone else who knows your child if you are a single parent), some place private and quiet, and devote a whole evening to a five-facet review of each of your children. Simply ask yourselves, "How is Jimmy doing physically" (growth, health, etc.)? "How is he doing socially" (friends, etc.)? "How is he doing mentally" (in school, etc.)? "How is he doing emotionally" (moods, attitudes, etc.)? and "How is he doing spiritually" (values, responsibility, etc.)?

Take notes. Focus. Ask each other questions. Look for any problems that may be emerging in any of the five areas, but also look for opportunities -- for aptitudes, for emerging gifts, for things you should develop or give attention to. Don't worry about the complexity of trying to think about five separate facets of each child. Generally the review will help you to simplify. Most facets will be fine, and you will usually come home having isolated two or three "areas of concern" to focus on during the month ahead.

We'll make two promises to parents who hold a five-facet review once a month consistently over several months: (a) You will avoid or curtail serious problems because you will notice them early while they can still be "nipped in the bud;" and (b) you will know your children better as unique individuals, recognizing some of their special gifts and finding ways to help them develop themselves and become more appreciative of their own individuality.

For access to weekly parenting tips, Click here for Member Benefits and Registration.